Tuesday, May 31, 2011

New pictures of Brooke!

Today I am almost 26 weeks pregnant (Thursday is the actual day), so I am now at the start of the third trimester!  I think it's going to start going faster now.  The past week I have been more exhausted than previously, and I finally figured out that it's probably a result of the allergy medicine I began taking a week ago.  I decreased the amount to a half pill per day and I have been feeling more energetic.  Thank goodness!  Also, my tongue swelling has finally gone down and my sores have healed on my tongue, so I am feeling so much better!

I gained almost 3 pounds in the past week!  I really hope I don't continue gaining like that or else I will definitely go over the recommended amount of weight gain!  I think I will be okay, but that was definitely a surprise.  I definitely feel like my belly has gotten a little bigger, so hopefully it's Brooke growing :)

Today's bump picture:

Today we got to see Brooke again and we got some great pictures!  They wanted to measure her to make sure she is on track since I had high blood pressure at my last appointment.  She is measuring 25 weeks and 4 days, so she is right on track!  She is in the 50th percentile, perfectly average, which is great because I don't want to try to push out a big baby.

We got some great pictures of her.  We got a couple of great profile shots, and when we tried to get a shot of her face directly, she decided she didn't want to cooperate.  We got one face shot with her yawning, but she was pressed into the placenta a little bit, so it's not very clear.  We also got a shot of her covering her face with her hand.  So cute!

Confirmation that she is definitely a girl (the lines between her legs are her labia) :)

Some great profile shots (isn't she cute!?!?):

Face shot of her yawning (she is right up against the placenta, which is why the right side of her face is blurry):

Hand covering her face (she turned away from us and is facing away from the placenta):

Before the ultrasound, I had to get my blood drawn for the glucose test.  That was pretty easy.  I had to drink a small bottle of sugary liquid and get my blood drawn an hour later.  The liquid tasted like watered down orange Triaminic (sp?) that I used to take when I was young for colds, so it wasn't too bad (I used to love that stuff :))

After the ultrasound, I got my blood pressure taken.  The first time it was 132/75, but she let me rest some and then we took it again and it was 124/72 or something like that, so that was great!  When I took it at home this morning, it was much lower, but my Dr has to make her decisions on my blood pressure at their office, so I was glad it was okay.

Then I met with my Dr and she said everything is looking really great!  So we don't need to worry about anything right now.  Hopefully my bp will stay normal and I will be able to have a normal pregnancy and delivery.  I will continue to monitor my bp at home, but I have a feeling it will be fine.  I go back to the Dr in 3 weeks and then I start going every 2 weeks after that.  Very exciting that it's starting to get to the end!  I can't wait for Brooke to get here!

Last night we went to visit Brady.  Paul read the last 2 chapters from the book, so we are going to start the third book in the trilogy next time we visit him.  It was so nice to visit him.  We usually visit him in the middle of the month, but we had been so busy this month that we were late.  I really missed visiting him.  I know we're not going to be able to go every month eventually, and I think I'm really going to miss it once we start going less frequently.

After Paul finished the book, I talked to Brady for a little bit and got a little sad and upset.  That was the first time I had cried at his grave in a while.  But it felt good to let it out.  We've been through a lot over the past year and next week I will be 27 weeks along, which was how far along I was when Brady was born.  I've also been thinking a lot about Brooke's birth, which is going to be right around the time Brady was born, so I've been thinking about Brady and what we went through a lot.

I have a feeling that Brooke's birth is going to be very emotional for me.  I know I will be so extremely happy to meet Brooke, but I will also be sad thinking about Brady.  I'm a little nervous that Brooke will end up being late and will be born on Brady's birthday.  I thought about asking my Dr to induce me before that to ensure that didn't happen, but Paul and I decided that we will leave that decision up to God, so we will see what happens.  I miss Brady :( but I know his life went the way it did for many reasons and I am thankful for what we went through and for now having Brooke.  It's just a little hard to deal with sometimes.  But overall, I am extremely happy and feel so blessed.  I love my life and I wouldn't change a thing.

Thursday, May 26, 2011

25 weeks

Today I am 25 weeks along, so I only have 1 more week until I begin the third trimester.  So far, this process has still not sped up.  I count the weeks down, and even count half weeks, until Brooke is born.  I am getting more emotional (I just had trouble signing into my blogger account and I'm about to cry out of frustration) and I really hate it.  My discomfort is about the same as it's been the past couple of weeks, so it's not horrible yet, but I am getting bigger, so I'm sure it will get worse soon.  Brooke should begin growing quickly soon - about 1/2 pound per week starting in the third trimester according to my books, so that should really make me begin to pop.  I'm excited for the change and definitely excited for her to get bigger, but I know it will also be hard to deal with the discomfort, especially sitting in a desk chair all day.

This week I've been especially emotional because my tongue is swollen for some reason, so it's rubbing against my teeth and I've got sores on the side of it as a result.  I swear I can deal with any pain except for mouth pain.  I haven't been eating as much or as well as a result, so I really hope it clears up soon.  It feels a little better today, but I'm going to go to the doctor just to see what she thinks.  I was using a canker sore medicine to try to help it, but I just looked it up yesterday and it's a Category C drug, which means I shouldn't be using it :(  Ugh!!!!  So frustrating.

Today I weighed and measured myself.  I've gained another pound and a half inch, so I'm growing nice and steadily, which is great.  Hopefully that will help prevent stretch marks, but who knows.  My blood pressure was high today for the first time in over a week (132/75), so that's not great.  But because of my mouth issues this week, I haven't been following the diet as much, so I'm going to be more diligent about that and hopefully tomorrow it will be low again.  I have noticed that it's been a little higher in the past week, but I figured that it is just rising back up to my normal level of ~120/80 because my doctor said it would go down in the second trimester and then go back up to normal level in the third trimester, so we'll see.  I'm not freaking out about it, and I'm trying not to :) 

On Tuesday we get to see Brooke again because my OB wants me to have another ultrasound since my BP was high at my last appointment.  I'm so excited to see her again!  It's so much fun to look at her.  I have been feeling her so much, but I love to see her.  I try to focus on all the good parts about being pregnant, like getting to feel her, but honestly I really don't enjoy being pregnant at all.  It's very lonely because I get tired so easily and can't han out and do things as much as I used to.  My emotions are all over the place and I get uncomfortable easily.  I am able to eat more fun things than I did when I was watching my weight, and thankfully I haven't been craving a bunch of bad food, but I do have to watch what I eat somewhat to try to keep my BP low. 

But despite all the negatives, I am SO extremely grateful to have a healthy baby growing inside of me and the opportunity to look forward to her birth, instead of dreading it like I did with Brady.  I feel extremely blessed that I was able to get pregnant so quickly after Brady passed and I realize that Brooke would not be in this world if things hadn't gone exactly like they did with Brady.  So I know this is all part of God's plan, and the reason this process can be difficult is to prepare me for the difficulties of life with a baby.  I need to get over myself and just enjoy it all because life goes by so quickly and I really need to remember to enjoy every day.

So I will try to focus on the positives.  Yesterday was a difficult day, but it ended really great.  I lounged in the pool for a while in the early evening and then watched a great American Idol finale.  So I choose to focus on those memories rather than the emotional craziness I felt yesterday during the day.  I really love that pool.  I have already realized some of the benefits from it, and it will get even better once the landscaping and patio furniture is in, which should be soon!!!

Here is my most recent bump picture.  I feel like I'm getting rounder and I seem to be carrying Brooke high.

Friday, May 20, 2011

24 weeks

Yesterday I reached 24 weeks along.  This week I haven't been as uncomfortable as I was last week, but I have felt a little more "off" some nights.  I had to go to bed at 9:00 Wednesday night because I just wasn't feeling well and I'm not sure why.  It felt like Brooke was dancing on the bottom of my uterus, so that could have contributed :)  She has become even more active!  Last night while we were watching American Idol and I was eating popcorn, she was kicking me almost constantly!  It was so crazy!  She has never been that consistently active before.  I think she was kicking me for at least 30 minutes or longer.

I'm sort of getting used to the fact that this being inside of me is kicking me, but if I really think about it, it's still so nuts!  I mean, I have a baby growing in me!  How bizarre is that?!?  Nature is just amazing.  I can't even imagine how crazy it's going to be when she gets bigger and stronger and I'm able to see body parts through my belly.  That will just be unreal.  I'm so excited for it!

I decided this morning that I'm going to return the heartbeat monitor.  Since Brooke is moving around so much and so consistently, I don't feel the need to have it anymore.  And since I haven't even been using it, it makes sense to return it.  Also, at this point, if she stops kicking or kicks significantly less, I'm supposed to go to the doctor and have her checked out anyway, so the monitor wouldn't help anyway.  I'm so happy to be at this point and feel so good about her health and well-being.  So different from last time.

Last night I bought a Jumperoo from someone on Craig's list.  I got it for $30 and it's $90 new!  Great savings!  I'm really excited about getting this baby stuff and trying to save on it.  I love hand-me-downs!  But I was happy to splurge a little on the bedding set.  We got the nursery decorations that I ordered in the mail yesterday, so we are all ready to get the nursery painted!  Time to call the painter and start planning :)

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Feeling great!

This week has started off SO much better than last week!  I think having a great, relaxing weekend really helped.  My back isn't hurting as much this week and I'm not getting as uncomfortable in my desk chair either.  This really helps my mood; although, I still get annoyed/irritated very easily these days.  Thankfully, that feeling doesn't last and I recognize that it's a false feeling, so I'm able to get over it quickly.

Today I weighed myself and I was 148.2 lbs.  That doesn't seem too bad, except a week ago I was only around 146 lbs, and yesterday I was 147.4 lbs, so something is definitely going on!  I'm really hoping it's Brooke growing and not myself :)  I was a little bad this weekend food-wise, but not terrible, and I'm still exercising, so I'm taking that to mean that Brooke is growing.  According to the books, she should be around 1.5 lbs right now!  That is almost a half pound more than Brady was when he was born at 27 weeks (I'm almost 24 weeks right now).  I have a good feeling that Brooke is on track and doing fine.  Yesterday she kicked me so hard that I yelled out a little out of surprise.  It was so funny and great!  That means she is getting stronger, which I love to feel.

The past few days I have begun reading about the labor and birth process in a book I have.  It's a little scary, but it actually makes me interested in attempting labor and birth without pain meds!  I know, crazy, right?  I have always been a painkiller advocate, but for some reason, I really feel the desire to attempt it without painkillers to see if I can do it.  Maybe it's because I was so out of it for Brady's birth (because of the magnesium drip required for my high blood pressure) and I really want to be more aware of everything for Brooke's birth.  I also want to see if I can stand the pain.  I'm sort of a wuss when it comes to pain and feeling bad, but I have 5 tattoos, so obviously I can stand the pain when I need to, so why not during labor and birth?  Of course, I will reserve the right to get an epidural, but maybe I'll try to do it without it.  Anyway, those are my thoughts for now.  I plan on researching the natural birth process over the summer to see if I think I can do it and to find out some coping mechanisms for the pain.  Then I can decide if I really want to try it and if I think I should take a class to really prepare for it (probably a good idea :)).

It occurred to me this morning how different of a place I am in at this point than I was with Brady at this same point.  With Brady, a week from now I found out that his placenta was failing, and 2 weeks after that they induced me.  This weekend, I bought the nursery bedding and this morning I put it in the crib.  It is so fun and exciting to begin to decorate the nursery and plan for labor and delivery.  It's so amazing how different things are this time.  I'm able to focus on the future and on positive things rather than worrying about the baby's health and planning burial arrangements.  It really makes me so incredibly thankful that Brooke is healthy and makes me realize that I am so lucky to have this chance to have a baby again.  I am so thankful for all the time I have with her, even the uncomfortable, irritable experiences I have as I get bigger.  It's all worth it in the end.

Reading about the birth process just makes me tear up because I can't wait to hold her and get to see her.  It will be so amazing, and I know I will be thinking about Brady then too.  I know in my heart that Brooke's birth will be so much better than Brady's, not just for the obvious reason of giving birth to a living, healthy baby, but I also feel that the entire process will just be much easier and better.  I think that's why I'm having the desire to attempt a natural birth.  It's very strange, but I'm going to go with my gut and see where it leads me.

My belly is definitely rounder now, and it's much harder to bend over at this point because I can actually feel my uterus crowding my other organs.  What a strange feeling!  I know it will get even more crowded in there eventually, but for some reason I'm really looking forward to the third trimester.

Thursday, May 12, 2011

An emotional but good week

This past week was emotional but good.  My blood pressure has consistently stayed low, which is so awesome. I've somewhat altered my diet to follow the Brewer diet, but I didn't really have to make many changes, so that was nice.  I have no idea if I'll need to follow it in order to keep my bp low, but it's a healthy diet, so it couldn't hurt.

I have been such an emotional mess lately.  On Sunday I really got upset, but I think it was mainly because of being tired and overwhelmed with house stuff.  I'm really tired of having house crap to worry about.  I want to be able to just relax and not worry about things.  I think once this month is over, things will be better because we're planning on having all of the backyard stuff done by the end of this month.  Only 2.5 weeks to go until that time!

I have been getting more uncomfortable lately and my lower back has been hurting.  I know it will only get worse in the third trimester, but I am thankful that it's not as bad as it could be.  I'm still exercising, though I'm not doing as much because of my back pain and occasional knee pain, and my bp is staying low.  So I'm definitely happy about all that.  My weight gain seems to be consistent and on track, so that's good too.  And the best thing going on right now is that I feel Brooke at least half a dozen times a day.  When I feel her, I get so happy.  It's really nice.

I'm starting to try to plan for Brooke's arrival, but the house stuff is taking precedence.  That's another reason I want to get this house stuff done by June.  I want the entire third trimester to focus on getting stuff ready for Brooke.  I can't wait!!

Here's my most recent bump:

Thursday, May 5, 2011


After freaking out all day yesterday about my blood pressure spike, I ended up having low blood pressure last night before bed, this morning right when I woke up, and even after I exercised and showered.  So I'm feeling a lot better about it.  I'm still going to make some diet changes to ensure that it doesn't increase later in the pregnancy, but at least it doesn't seem to be increasing already so that's such a relief.

Unfortunately, I am upset again today but about something else - my hair cut, which is such an insignificant issue, but I am crying and upset.  Obviously, my hormones are raging right now and it really sucks.  I hate allowing such stupid things to upset me, but I can't seem to let them go.  I hope this is temporary. :(

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

High blood pressure

This morning when I took my blood pressure, it was higher than yesterday (136/76), and I even meditated before taking it to try to lower it :(  This is really scaring me.  I am so afraid that my blood pressure is going to get too high again and cause Brooke problems and even require me to deliver her early.  Because this is what happened with Brady, I am scared to death.  I am going to try changing my diet to low sodium and some other changes and I am praying that will help.  Please pray for me that I have the strength to stay positive and hopeful, so that I don't put a strain on Brooke, and please pray for Brooke that she remains healthy and is able to grow properly.

Monday, May 2, 2011

OB Appointment - 5/2/2011

Today was my regular OB appointment.  My blood pressure was a little high (140/85), which is higher than it was the past 2 times, which averaged around 135/85.  Since it was above 135, they did a urine sample and some blood work.  I had taken my blood pressure this morning and it was a little higher than it usually is, but it was still fine at 120/75.  Even though it appears as though being at the doctor's office is causing my bp to spike, my Dr still wants to be careful, so she wants to do an ultrasound at 26 weeks to make sure Brooke is still growing normally.  And based on her size during the ultrasound and my blood pressure, they may continue doing ultrasounds every 3-4 weeks.

At this point, I'm not too worried about it.  I really do think that I've just been anxious lately about the backyard project and I felt more anxious when I got to the Dr office this morning, so I think that's all it is.  But I'm going to take my blood pressure daily from now on until I see it going down.  My Dr said that your blood pressure is supposed to decrease in the second trimester and then increase back to normal in the third trimester, so it definitely shouldn't be going up at this point.

I'm very excited that I get to have another ultrasound and see Brooke, which will be on the morning of May 31.  I will then meet with my Dr and get my weight and blood pressure as usual after the ultrasound.  I've gained about 6 pounds in the past couple of weeks after not gaining any for a couple of week.  Because of that and because I've been feeling Brooke kick a lot, I'm not worried about her size.  I think she's doing great.  But it will be really nice to have the ultrasound confirm that.

Unfortunately my Dr didn't do the bedside ultrasound today, so I didn't get any updated pictures of her.  But I will get plenty next time!  Please pray for me and Brooke that my blood pressure goes down and that Brooke grows properly.